What Now? by Christina


DAVE PIRNER: STUFF OF DREAMS

Last month boy rock stars told us whether they'd date Winona. This month girl music luminaries answer the pointed question, "Would you go out with Dave Pirner?" Courtney Love, singer/songwriter of the band Hole, gave us her usual spiel: "I used to want to date Dave Pirner. Why do you think I moved to Minneapolis? But the real Dave Pirner, in the flesh, was a little disappointing. Then I decided to be Dave Pirner. That's so much more fun!" No argument here. Next up we have Erin "Hot Lips" Smith, guitarist for Bratmobile. "I actually have a big problem with the guy," she said. "Ooooh, I think he's gross! Not only is his name weird, but he has weird lips. They just make you think, Ooh, I would not want to kiss them." Moving right along, Janet Beveridge Bean of Eleventh Dream Day and Freakwater said, "No, because I don't like his hair." Her bandmate Tasha wouldn't date him either. "I like chubby men with fresh cheeks," she explained.

CUTE BAND ALERT

Blonde Redhead (the name comes from an old song by DNA) is an art-punk band that's the creation of twins Simone (drums) and Amadeo (guitar, vocals). They're originally from Italy (accents and everything) and in 1990 formed a trio in New York City. In the beginning, it was the twins, singer and guitar player Kazu, and then a string of bass players until they finally settled on Maki. Kazu's got a sweet but powerful voice and occasionally screams her little head off and plays her guitar with a drumstick. Amadeo sometimes rubs walkie-talkies together to get a wacky Breeders-like sound. Simone plays a fine backbeat. In 1993, Sonic Youth let Blonde Redhead open for them on their Italian tour. When I saw them live, I especially liked "Sciuri Sciuri," which means something like "woman-child" in Italian (I thought they were saying "sweet sugar"). What really got me was when Amadeo hugged Kazu in the middle of a song. To get a single, send a $4 check or money order postage paid to Smells Like Records, PO Box 6179, Hoboken, NJ 07030. Their CD should be out on the same label soon.

The Two Naomis

In her book The Beauty Myth, Naomi Wolf theorized that supermodels and fashion magazines are hurting women's self-esteem. But in the final analysis, who's the bigger feminist, the author or the supermodel Naomi Campbell?

Naomi Wolf: "Fourteen-year olds are comparing themselves and their own bodies to that real explicit, clear, graphic image of an anorexic body with breast implants that you see in Vogue models."
Naomi Campbell: "Some people open a magazine and think, "God, I've got to look like that.' That's when it's like, wait a minute. You look at it to get ideas, not to starve yourself and get anorexic."
Naomi Wolf: "Ideas of beauty go deeper than skin deep, so that what I hear from young women is, 'I feel like, when I'm making love to my boyfriend, there are three people in the room. There's me, there's him, and there's her--the ideal--and everybody's looking at her.'"
Naomi Campbell: "I don't think beauty is a face value. It really comes from within."
Naomi Wolf: "Women are systematically punished for taking a strong public stand. For instance, when Hillary Clinton shows anger, that makes front page news."
Naomi Campbell: "When [you] say no to a photographer...then you're a bitch. You can't win. They're going to call you a bitch either way. If I'm a bitch, I'm a hardworking bitch."
Naomi Wolf: "The male body is home to me."
Naomi Campbell: "If I say I don't want to do a picture nude, it's my body. I don't have to."

Kate Moss Is Not Anorexic

Or so say the responders to the poll in the February "WN," most of whom were "naturally skinny" 5'7", 90-pound girls who were really offended and hurt when I suggested that "no one's every vertebra is apparent naturally"! A girl who signed her letter "My metabolism is faster than yours," said it all: "Why must you be so jealous? Thin people have been and always will be the most attractive people. My advice to you is to get over it, because... Kate rules!"

Cute Boy Alert

To make up for the fact that Cute Band Alert [Guided by Voices} is not that cute this month, I thought I'd show this picture of our favorite boy model Brent (he was on the March cover and in the prom story, the April "Subculture" fashion and the May hair color story). Mary points out that this represents early Brent, pre-blonde highlights (the ones we gave him). And since we've been getting a lot of letters for him, I'd like to advise you to send them directly to Bethann Model Mgmt., 36 N. Moore St., New York, NY 10013. **note from richard: if it seems like i am a little obsessed with brent, it's cause i am. well, at first i thought he was really ugly (see March cover) and looked like the kid from growing pains. but now he is growing on me.

Miracle on 34th Street, Part II

by Ethan

When Christina gave me my latest assignment as staff boy, I was a little nervous. "Go to Macy's, buy a pair of underwear and get Kate Moss to autograph it," she said with a little edge of glee in her voice. But wait a minute, I thought. If the skinniest boy in the world (me) meets up with the skinniest girl in the world (Kate), won't that warp the space-time continuum and cause some kind of massive matter-anti-matter explosion, destroying millions of innocent Macy's shoppers? Well, a job is a job, so I strapped on my trust Flux Transporter and went to 34th Street. As it turned out, there was no dangerous, life-threatening explosion, except for the explosion of fear in my heart as Miss Anorexia UK flashed me the most miserable, insincere-looking smile ever, revealing a mouthful of yucky brown teeth. After she wrote "Ethana, Love, Kate Moss, X" on my undies, I left unscathed but shaken.

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